At the service for a friend today, Father asked us to each think about the many ways Cynthia touched our life. He asked us this near the end of the service, after songs and scripture, after a beautiful eulogy that held each of us in an atmosphere of love, beauty, peace, and grace. He paused to give us time to remember, and then asked us to think about how we could incorporate those qualities that touched us most into our own life, our own way of being.
I thought this was a very powerful way to honor Cynthia’s life. There were hundreds of people in the church. Imagine each person choosing one of her many positive traits and working consciously to make it one of our own traits. She touched many lives and left a strong uplifting legacy; now Father reminds us to continue spreading her legacy by building our own.
Earlier in the service, I had the thought that if I started now, maybe there will be enough time to make the kind of difference she had made for others, in the lives of at least some of the people that know me. Almost before I finished the thought, one of my saboteurs (saboteurs are those gremlins of your mind that like to keep you from changing) mocked me by reminding me that I am not charming, peaceful, graceful, calm, serene, or many of the other words used to describe Cynthia. Nor am I as completely grounded in assuredness of the love of God as she is.
Father’s words brought me back into what I could do, instead of what I am not yet. He reminded me that we can consciously become the change we want, that we can choose one trait we want to expand and make it a part of ourselves. Father would make a good life coach. Come to think of it, he already is.
I can choose to become a better me, even if I neither could be, nor want to be, everything my friend Cynthia was to those in her world. I can choose one characteristic of Cynthia’s to develop as my own. When my time here is over, perhaps this trait will have been passed to others and in doing so all our lives will be even more worthwhile.